$@%%@^^!! CAT!! thinks he’s a puppy
by Dame Eleanor Hull
When we got Glendower, he looked like a very attractive cat, but we soon discovered that he was really a puppy. Or a cat suffering from demonic canine possession. Or maybe he was really a rodent. He chewed on things, especially cords. It’s a wonder he didn’t electrocute himself. We cleared all the electrical cords and connectors out of my study so we could confine him safely when we couldn’t watch him. For months, I charged my laptop downstairs overnight and worked on battery power only when I was in my study. I couldn’t leave any books or papers on my desk, either, because he would knock them on the floor or chew on them.
I tried wrapping cords in aluminum foil, as a friend suggested. That just made them even more attractive.
Eventually he seemed to outgrow puppydom and turn back into the cat he appears to be. I stopped worrying about him chewing on things. I moved back into my study. I acquired my 27-inch monitor and set it up. Life was good.
So I came into my study this morning, fired up the equipment, and my laptop couldn’t find the external monitor. The monitor kept going to sleep. I fiddled with connections and the control panel and so on. Finally I noticed that that damnable swyvyng animal had chewed almost through the connector cable. The good news is that it was only the cable, no damage to the actual converter dingus, and even better is that the cable for my MP3 player can substitute in for it, so I don’t even have to go out before I can get back to the IPM.
Basement Cat was like this as a kitten as well—more with papers than with cords, though. And he is now a very sweet and mostly well-behaved cat. So given time, I expect we can hope that Glendower will also settle down.
But as I said last spring, if I had wanted a puppy I would have adopted a goddamned puppy.
Oh. This is my 600th post. How appropriate that it’s a big grumble about cats and electronics, with an undertone about manuscripts.